With the religious ban on the horizon and a rise in racially motivated crimes, I felt it was time to discuss racism and where it might stem from. 

Children are not racist by nature, nor are they born with damaging assumptions about people in any minority group. So, why are people racist? Where does their intolerance come from? It’s simple, racism is taught. Promoting equality, appreciation and acceptance for all people begins at home.

When my oldest was in the first grade, he came home from school one day and said, “Mommy, I wish I was white.” I was so taken aback from his comment and started wondering if he was being bullied. When I asked him why, he simply said, “My friend wants me to come play at his house, but his parents said I can’t because I’m black.”

I could not believe that we were dealing with this sort of discrimination in 2011. I was hurt for him, but he seemed to think it was no big deal, as though I could just make that happen for him. The sad part in all of this was the fact that those words came from an innocent child’s mouth, who had heard it from his parents. I wonder what his views are today, at 13 years old? Can you imagine?

When I was thirteen my friend said to me, “You’re pretty for a black girl.” I remember thinking, “why can’t I just be pretty? Period.” That comment came from a place of ignorance. I don’t think she meant any harm by it, but it’s possible that she grew up in a home where it was thought that black people are inferior and less attractive.

I was raised by white parents who had liberal views towards life, marriage, interracial families and friendships, rights for everyone, etc. Thus, I have chosen to raise my children the same way.  So, it’s difficult to hear people with such strong negative opinions about someone else’s faith, religion, ancestry, sexual orientation, socioeconomic background, or anything else.

When you build a barrier to acceptance, you create ignorance and fear. That fear can turn into hate and hate just creates more hate.  It’s a vicious cycle and now that we’re in 2019, I feel that we are regressing. We are regressing when tragedies such as the Orlando shooting and the murder of 50 Muslims in a mosque still happen. We are regressing when we know that racial profiling is still very much alive and well.

My husband and I can tell you many stories of being pulled over for DWB — driving-while-black. You won’t believe it, or maybe you will. The Coalition Avenir Québec (CAQ) is asking for a religious ban, but who is that really targeting? Muslim women. 

If you believe that racism no longer exists, you might be living under a rock. Racism comes in many forms. Asians are smart and good at math. All Indians smell like curry. Most Muslim men abuse their wives and are often associated with terrorist groups. Being gay is a choice that can be prayed away. These are all prejudice statements that you have undoubtedly heard. Chances are you shrugged it off, rolled your eyes, maybe even laughed or agreed with the comment.

Know that when you stay silent to these prejudices and racist stereotypes, you perpetuate the problem. Children are sponges and what you adhere to, they will as well. So, why not make it positive and make it about inclusion? It is your responsibility as a parent to teach your children about acceptance. What will your plan of action be to fight racism?